Ten phrases that lower the temperature without lowering the standard.
Know what to say when you disagree, someone gets defensive or a conversation starts going wrong.
Get my free guide, 10 Power Statements for Disagreeing Better, with practical phrases to help you challenge a point, understand another perspective and bring a difficult conversation back on track.
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A practical guide
10 Power Statements
for Disagreeing Better
Dean Leak
Inside the guide
You can have a valid point and still struggle to get it heard.
When a conversation gets tense, it's easy to push harder, shut down or say something you regret. These phrases give you a starting point for responding differently.
A preview of what's inside:
01
“Tell me more…”
Understand what's behind someone's view before you respond, and give yourself a moment to think.
02
The Labelling Technique
Acknowledge what the other person seems to be feeling, without assuming you've got it right.
03
The De-escalation Phrase
Help someone feel heard so there's room to discuss the disagreement.
04
The Repair Statement
What to say when you've become defensive or your words have landed badly.
05
The “Third Space” Phrase
Find a starting point you can both work from when the conversation feels stuck.
Bonus
Audit Your Silence
Identify a conversation you've been avoiding and what leaving it unsaid is costing you.
See it in action
When someone says something you strongly disagree with…
Try: “Tell me more about what’s led you to that view.”
You're giving yourself a fuller understanding of their reasoning before you challenge it.
The words matter. So does how you use them.
I'm Dean Leak. I help leaders and teams handle disagreement, build trust and have the conversations they've been avoiding.
My work spans Olympic gold-medal-winning teams, FTSE 100 companies and senior government leaders. This guide brings together ten phrases I use to help people put those skills into practice.
Some of these are phrases I use myself. Others are techniques I've learned from hostage negotiators and other practitioners, adapted for everyday conversations.
Send me the 10 phrases